A lot of people have asked me when or why I became obsessed with makeup. Most of you knew nothing of my obsession or fascination until recently. I guess I've hidden it for fear of being chastised about being superficial or conceited. It's nothing like that though, and if you can't see past my makeup or understand where I'm coming from, then obviously, you won't be reading this blog anyways. =)
There are two memories that I have that I believe help explain all of this business.
It all started when I was a little girl. I was your typical girly girl, but didn't have any girly friends really. In fact, I used to play with my brother and his friends more than I did with girls. I used to beg my mom for a sister, but that never happened, obviously. I didn't have much girly influence around me. However, I've always been intrigued by beauty and fashion. On a particular shopping trip with my mom, I was sitting in the basket waiting for my mom while watching other people and I remember I heard the familiar CLIK-CLAK of high heels. For some reason, I still remember associating that CLIK-CLAK with power and confidence. I wanted to be that woman someday, wearing heels, letting everyone know of my presence. Silly, I know, but those were my thoughts and I can't deny that I still don't have those thoughts when I wear a pair of heels.
Another memory that I have is when my mom used to take me and my brother to the library and allowed us to explore and check out whatever we wanted. I'd pile up twenty books or more and take them all home with me to read. My mom once checked out a book called, "The Art of Makeup" by Kevyn Aucoin. I remember sitting on my mom's bed, flipping through the book and being mesmerized by how different people could look with makeup. I was fascinated by how it was more than just lipstick and eyeliner; It was art.
I've always been creative and makeup has been an outlet for me to express that. I begged my mom to start letting me wear makeup in 6th grade and she agreed. She let me buy THREE things - a gold-bronze eyeshadow (it was Covergirl's Mink), a peach blush, and brown mascara. Later on, I talked her into eyeliner. I was always shy and quiet in school, being somewhat "nerdy" and just plain invisible most of the time. I wasn't really concerned with makeup or fashion much but rather with getting all A's. It's never been a priority or a necessity. I don't wear crazy makeup during the day. In fact, I don't wear much at all, which is probably why a lot of people had no idea I dabbled in this hobby. I don't think you HAVE to wear it every day either. It only becomes superficial when you feel like you CAN'T be seen without it. And, I'm a true believer in INNER beauty. Regardless if I wear makeup or not, I hope others will see THAT before they see anything else. That's how I was raised, so no makeup look will ever be a substitute for that. But, nevertheless, makeup is a passion for me - a creative outlet...
Combining all that power, confidence, and creativity is where all of this came from. Now, it's a hobby, just like people paint or fix up cars - I do makeup. When I get bored or want to be creative, I put makeup on. I only recently started sharing my hobby with others because I believe that everyone should share their talents with the world, just as Marianne Williamson says:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Why shouldn't I share my art and creativity with others? I've found that many are interested. What's so wrong with making others feel beautiful or confident - making them feel like they can shine? Bobbi Brown's "Pretty Powerful" campaign pretty much sums up what I believe. Most girls can feel pretty, but with a few makeup tweaks here and there, their confidence skyrockets and then you feel 'pretty powerful.'
Makeup is a way to express myself, something that fascinates me. Why conceal (no pun intended-hehe) a talent that ought to be shared with the world? It makes me happy because it's fun. It makes me happy because I like to make others feel good. It makes me happy because I like the feeling of having sisters - girls to talk to that enjoy just being girls. This is my creativity, my passion, a simple hobby...
So, if you're interested, come along for the ride. :)
